Wednesday, January 31, 2007

First Ever Stupid Angelos Giant Douche Award: Boston - Stupidest City in America

Stupid Angelos Giant Douche Award

That's right, its the first annual...weekly...daily Stupid Angelos Giant Douche Award. The innagural winner is none other than Boston's mayor Thomas Menino

For the record, that is him on the right.

This site is lucky enough to have an interview with our honorable mayor about the situation with the lite-brites in Boston.

SA: Thank you so much for talking to us sir. I'm sure you are very busy today

Menino: unintelligible mumbling

SA: Ummm, thanks. So what was the reason for Boston reacting in such an extreme manner to this ad campaign?

Menino: unintelligible mumbling

SA: Okkkkkkkkay. Did you realize that these small, harmless boxes had been in Boston for 3 weeks now?

Menino: unintelligible mumbling chowdah!! unintelligible mumbling

SA: So how can you explain the fact that many other cities had this ad campaign and did not react like Boston did?

Menino: unintelligible mumbling *takes plain white envelope from a teamster*

SA: What do you have to say to those of us who are now embarrassed to be associated with Boston?

Menino: Gooooooo Sox

SA: Thank you for your time, you Giant Douche.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007


Real quick - I really like my logo. I think it sums up my attitude real well....

About Me and the Blog

Couple quick hits about me:
  • Born in DC
  • Lived inside the beltway in MD until college
  • Went to high school in DC
  • Love the Redskins
  • Love the O's
  • Root for the Terps
  • Went to college and still live in Boston
  • Married

That's it. That's the list. This blog will not be me writing about me. This will be me writing stuff mostly about sports and hopefully funny sometimes. I will not write about my day. I will not write about my home life, or my commute, or my dog (I might break this rule), or my job, or anything like that. The only time I will write about me is when I do something sports related (expect if I play golf - nobody but nobody wants to hear about someone else' s golf game). I can't promise I won't bore you with fantasy details once in a while...

Sometimes I'll write about non-sports stuff. I love music, politics, Madden, beer, slacking ummm...what was I talking about, I got a little distracted. Another thing, I do have a life. So we'll see how often I update this. I get the feeling it will depend entirely on how busy I am at work. But outside of work, I have a wife, a house, friends, and shit to do (starting with playing Madden). So this is not my first priority, but I want to give it a shot.

Things to know:

  • This will contain many inside jokes from Deadspin
  • I suck at spelling - deal with it
  • U2 is the greatest band ever - no arguments
  • Apparently I really like to use ordered lists
  • Also I am a computer nerd (Engineering Degree in Comp Sci) so I may spout some incredibly mundane useless crap once in a while - again deal with it

My biggest influence for doing this is Deadspin. I am not trying to compete with that site (or even the gay mafia at KSK). This is just a stupid blog, but hopefully once in a while I will put out something good and/or funny.

It Begins

Where to begin. Well I guess let me explain the title. Those of you coming from Deadpsin know exactly where it came from but for those who didn't....

Peter Angelos is an old decreptid dick who owns the Baltimore Orioles. Having grown up in DC/MD, I grew up rooting for the O's. Then this slick, ambulance chaser comes in and buys my team. At first, he takes the Daniel Synder approach (more on him later). Its fun, the O's make the playoffs. Then a little 12 year old bastard ruin my fun. Anyway, he takes the Synder approach again the next years. Again they makes the playoffs. Great team by the way.

The 1996 - 1997 Orioles were a ton of fun to watch. Pat Gillick, as GM, brought in a slew of high quality players to compliment Cal - the greatest SS of all time. Great players, great manager, great GM, and even a great announcer (Jon Miller before Joe Morgan made him insane). Then the greedy lowlife dick decides he'd rather test the patience of one of the most loyal fanbases in all of baseball.
  • He got rid of most of the good players
  • He got rid of the mananger
  • He got rid of the GM
  • He even got rid of the announcer (still don't get that one).
  • He signs Albert Belle (ugh!, that fucking worked out well)
  • He signs Sammy Sosa (ow, my ass is beginning to hurt)

All this accomplishes is pissing off a fanbase that had been constant for 50 years! Stupid Fucking Angelos. So where are we now? The O's might as well be the Royals...damn it. Do you realize how much it sucks when you know going into EVERY SINGLE DAMN YEAR that your team will suck?!?! Sorry, my inner SAS came out a bit there - WHERE ARE MY CHEESE DOODLES??

Anyway, so Peter Angelos sucks.


Okay so here we go. Wonder if this will get me fired....

Anyway, welcome to Stupid Angelos. More to come soon